Today I was driving along and I ended up driving behind a hearse. Inside the hearse was a coffin and I would assume that inside the coffin was a body.
It got me to thinking about a stand up bit that Jerry Seinfeld has done in the past where he is talking about boxes. Essentially the bit details that we use boxes for moving and that eventually we all end up in a box and it is our last big move.
I thought about the person in the box a few metres in front of me and I wondered that whether in their final breath, in their final thought if they were able to look back on their life and be satisfied that they had done everything possible to make it a good life.
Did this person live with regrets or did they have a happy life? Did they achieve everything they wanted to achieve or did they sacrifice their life to enrich the lives of his or hers family? Did they visit the places they wanted to see, try the foods they wanted to try and do the things they wanted to do or did they settle?
Settling is ok, so long as it brings you happiness. What isn’t ok is when you settle to please everyone except yourself.
Did this person tolerate instead of doing? Did they exist instead of living? Did they like instead of love? Did they sacrifice instead of being selfish a little bit?
I’ll never know about the person in the box in front of me on their last big move, and eventually I will be the one in the box as well, but what I don’t want when drawing my final breath and thinking my final thought and that thought is, what if?
I want no regrets at that time. I want to know that I did everything I wanted to do and I did those things for me. Not for anyone else. Is that selfish? Perhaps. But what is more selfish is living an existence when those around you are not happy because you’re not happy.
The old saying a happy wife equals a happy life is true but what about a happy life equals a happy life. For you and for those who choose to be on the journey with you. If you are happy then you are more than likely to influence the people who are around you and make them happy too. Don’t settle. Don’t change unless you want to, but live your life with no regrets.
The grass is sometimes greener on the other side. Not all the time but you’ll never know if you don’t have a look. We also only get one shot at life. One chance. There is no do-over. There is no repeat. One chance to make a difference. One chance to be happy. Life is too short.
So take a peep inside my coffin when I eventually undertake my last big move and I hope you see a man who lived his life the best he could and he did all he wanted and was happy. If you do see that man in the coffin then know that he died happy and with no regrets and that he did the best he could not just for himself, but for everyone he loved as well.
Let’s just make sure that peep inside the coffin and the last big move is a long, long time away. In the meantime, it’s time to start living with no regrets. Won’t you join me?
No regrets. After the past week, I have certainly realised that life is way too short to live with regrets.
Amazing and thought provoking post Jack. Thank you!
Thanks Mandi. Hope things have improved there.
Very well written Jack and no, you are not selfish. Always remember you deserve happiness. xoTan
Thanks Tania. Means a lot.
Hmm, interesting. I’m not sure I agree with you on some points but I do agree that life is far too short to be unhappy. I also think that in a “perfect” marriage (as perfect as one can be) one’s partner should try to make you happy, but in balance with you making them happy. Not so much being “selfish” but … for example my husband will always encourage me to do whatever I want. I will always encourage him to do whatever he wants. So it’s mutual giving rather than mutual taking. Hope that makes sense.
Hi Cate, thanks for reading. Agree that it should be based a lot on giving as well.
Hope you are well.
Someone told me something very interesting in the past few weeks – the grass may be greener on the other side, but eventually, it has to be mowed (lol) Awesome statement! I say, keep your side of the fence nice and it will give you everything you want and need (and sometimes more). Here’s to the happiness we all seek in our interwining lives of family and friends!